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About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in ...  (More)

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Couples: Tantric Sex and Menopause

Uploaded: Aug 3, 2018
Tantric Sex and Menopause: Practices for Spiritual and Sexual Renewal

By Diana Richardson and Janet McGeever

I recently read Tantric Sex and Menopause and found it to be profound, interesting, helpful and challenging. As a woman who went through menopause while my husband was in cancer treatment, my focus was on being a caregiver, using fierce love as his advocate. My focus was definitely not on menopause.

Eventually, when he was well again, we were faced with the aftereffects of menopause. Fortunately, my husband and I have good communication, so we talk through everything, including the changes from menopause. Reading Tantric Sex and Menopause gave us another path of discussion and exploration.

“In Tantra sex is not practiced for its own sake, not as indulgence or entertainment, but as an instrument for going beyond sex, for reaching health, balance, improved relationships, self-control, and eventually superior states of consciousness.”

Perhaps the biggest difference I understand is that the goal of Tantric sex is to be present in the moment, unfolding into the experience with your own body and one another, rather than going for orgasms. And therein is the challenging part.

I’m not a black and white, either/or type of person, so being present with my husband during sex and having orgasms seems fine with me. On the other hand, I haven’t had enough time to study Tantric sex and delve into it deeply to make informed opinions.

I think it’s a great read for couples who are approaching or are in the menopause stage of life. You’ll have plenty to think and talk about, and experiment with.

From the back cover: “As women, we live so closely to the body--through menstruation, pregnancy, birthing, motherhood, and then menopause. Each of these transitions changes a woman in a multitude of ways, most of which are celebrated. Yet menopause often causes women to feel despondent, as if our bodies are broken or deficient, especially when it comes to sex and intimacy. However, as tantric teachers Diana Richardson and Janet McGeever show, menopause has many hidden gifts to offer if we learn to embrace rather than suppress the changes this natural transition brings.

Shining the light of tantric intelligence on menopause, the authors reveal how to explore and experience menopause in a radically positive fashion, suffused with a sense of vital awakening and “re-wilding” of a woman’s sexuality, creativity, and spirituality. Explaining what to expect physically, emotionally, and spiritually, as well as what it means for relationships, they detail tantric practices and tools to connect with the body’s inner intuitive wisdom and heart energies, remove the “performance pressure” of conventional sex, and set the stage for passion and pleasure to thrive both in the bedroom and beyond. They explain why Tantra works for menopausal women and how their bodies are naturally entering a more tantric phase focused on creative, spiritual energy. They explore how, in Tantra, sex is practiced not for the sake of sex itself but as an instrument for going “beyond” sex, for better health, improved relationships, enhanced self-control and emotional balance, and even higher states of consciousness. They also offer many self-help practices, exercises, and meditations to reinforce a positive attitude toward menopause and overcome many of the physical and sexual problems, such as pain, dryness, loss of interest, and loss of libido.

Providing a guide for women who are approaching, experiencing, or have gone through menopause, the authors show how a more informed, tantric approach to menopause allows each woman to deepen her trust in the perfect functioning of the female body, embrace her natural sexual response, and reconnect with her inner self.”
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Posted by gualterio, a resident of another community,
on Aug 5, 2018 at 5:52 am

gualterio is a registered user.

After my wife had our daughter, when we were very young, for a uterus cancer surgery my wife was with menospause, that cost us a year of efforts to get to have a good sex, many friends of mine urged me to change of wife or that I had another woman, which was very easy for me at that time, but because I loved her so much, I never thought about abandoning her or replacing her with another woman, I always thought that we would achieve the pleasure that before the surgery we felt. I had to communicate more with her, to be more caring, not to stop caressing her and to make sex I would excite her first for almost an hour before the intercourse. At the beginning it was difficult and frustrating for both of us, but in the end we did it. Something that helped us was the support of her sisters and friends, a wide network of friendships with whom we shared and our fondness for the arts, particularly the art cinema and literature, this increased the sensitivity of both in a good amount of energy for erotic fantasy. Years later, communicating with the sexologist Jhon Money (Kinsey), I realized that I had followed the steps correctly to save our marriage.

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