Premarital and Couples: Are you Kinder to Strangers than to Your Partner? | Couple's Net | Chandrama Anderson | DanvilleSanRamon.com |

Local Blogs

Couple's Net

By Chandrama Anderson

E-mail Chandrama Anderson

About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in ...  (More)

View all posts from Chandrama Anderson

Premarital and Couples: Are you Kinder to Strangers than to Your Partner?

Uploaded: May 29, 2020
Is there a grain of truth to the statement "I am kinder to a stranger than I am to my partner/spouse?"

If so, consider these questions:

How did I get here?
How long has this been true?
Is this new for me, or a repeating pattern?
How did I treat my partner before?
What's my part in these exchanges?
Am I willing to be kind again?
What does being kind sound like? Look like? Feel like?
What can I do today to be kind and what do I need to do for myself to work on this?

Notice if you're thinking that if only . . . my partner were kind to me, I would be kind to him/her. You can change your own behavior, not his/hers. You only have control over yourself.

How do you feel when you are kind? How do you feel when you are unkind?

Someone once told me we can go without sex for a day, but we can't go for a day without justification!

Given that you are sheltering in place together, or having a Corona Virus "long-distance" relationship, kindness truly matters.

Take this into your own hands--today.












#marriagecounseling
#couplescounseling
#couplestherapy
#therapy
We need your support now more than ever. Can we count on you?

Comments

There are no comments yet for this post

Follow this blogger.
Sign up to be notified of new posts by this blogger.

Email:

SUBMIT

Post a comment

Posting an item on Town Square is simple and requires no registration. Just complete this form and hit "submit" and your topic will appear online. Please be respectful and truthful in your postings so Town Square will continue to be a thoughtful gathering place for sharing community information and opinion. All postings are subject to our TERMS OF USE, and may be deleted if deemed inappropriate by our staff.

We prefer that you use your real name, but you may use any "member" name you wish.

Name: *

Select your neighborhood or school community: *

Comment: *

Verification code: *
Enter the verification code exactly as shown, using capital and lowercase letters, in the multi-colored box.

*Required Fields


Get fact-based reporting on the COVID-19 crisis sent to your inbox daily.

Stay Together or End the Relationship? Independence or Interdependence?
By Chandrama Anderson | 0 comments | 2,487 views

Re-thinking my view on white privilege and structural racism
By Tim Hunt | 12 comments | 2,094 views

The Ballad of Andy and Rocky
By John A. Barry and Bill Carmel | 7 comments | 656 views