Throw the book at him!

Does anyone ever wonder why there is such an increase in crimes of this nature? Just this week alone our area has had several arrests and convictions of a sexual nature. Could Hollywood and the crap they show in magazines and on TV have anything to do with the clouded thinking of people? Even a 42 yr old married mother in Livermore was arrested last week for having sex with multiple boys around 14 yrs old. There is something seriously wrong with the culture right now and I think it may have to do with the lack of modesty and the sexual free-for-all promoted by the media.
Believe me, Lady Gaga, MTV and the songs our children listen to are not doing us any favors in raising virtuous generations to come.

It's always been there Marie, It's just constanly coming at us at all times with media and the web. You sound like the people that spoke poorly about Madonna, Elvis, and so on......I agree it's junk music, but music is rarely the cause for someone to be so foolish.

I think the Livermore mom was sentenced last week - her arrest was last year some time.

I think the media contributes to many crimes, but I think you have to have some propensity toward violent behaviors in order to be influenced by the media.

I hope the girl in question gets therapy, and has a family/support system to help her.

Marie, I see where you are coming from. You are probably a mother and very concerned. The thing is...you can't blame the media. The media gives us what we want to hear and believe it or not SEX SELLS. I am a 17 yr old girl from Monte Vista HS and I honestly dont think the media has an influence what-so-ever over teens. Its really about who you hang with, and how you were raised. The kid probably hung out around boys who felts like they could do what ever the hell they wanted and get away with it. If you go to Sam Nesis facebook you will see pictures of him with alchohol, and at parties, and really just messing around and doing illegal things. He was raised with the idea that he can do whatever he wants but this time it went too far. Hopefully it will be a good wakeup call for him.

I agree that our media is bombarding us which contributes to an over sexualized culture HOWEVER rape is a crime of VIOLENCE and has nothing to do with Lady Gaga, short skirts etc. Small children and 80 year olds get sexually assaulted...Catch my drift?

I'm going to say that there are valid points in every one's comments. Certainly we are the product of nature and parenting. But we are also molded by our environment and what is tolerated. If you allow someone to eat junk they will be unhealthy and by the same token we are what we consume spiritually. It would be easy to fully blame the media for this crime but in the end a choice was made by an individual...how he got there and what shaped his thinking? We can only wonder.

What kind of 18-year-old drives a rape van? I mean, I'll bet you a nickel-and-a-half he and his friends made that exact joke that that's what it was. Not so funny now, I guess...

The rape van joke is about four pages in on his FB Page.... Made by a female friend. It reads something like this....I love or think it's funny that you have a rape van, but no candy. Ick!

Well said Anne. Another concern I have is the way kids dress at school. I can't believe what I see at pick up time at MV. Is there or is there not a dress code? Why isn't it enforced? Are parents aware of what their kids are wearing to school? I'm not a prude but come on it's ridiculous. My 2 cents.

I am glad that the media reports on these, particularly what the consequences are for the offenders. I think it was a poor choice of words to say that the media "contributes" to the crimes. I believe most crimes would happen without media coverage and it would be negligent to not report on crime. There's also the misunderstanding that there are more dangerous crimes when I think more stories like these are getting coverage from multiple outlets.

Whatever the circumstances, I am glad that the girl came forward and reported it as so many who are sexually abused and assaulted let fear keep them from speaking up.

the police should start looking for more victims...he's a scary guy

Why is the discussion about what kids wear to school? What the heck does that have to do with rape? Rape is a violent crime against women. Have we stepped back in time, and women ask to be raped, if they wear a low cut shirt or a short skirt? Come on people. Rape is a violent crime with no excuse period.

No, there is never an excuse for rape. I was adding to the discussion concerning the influence of media on kids today and also the lack of concern by many parents on what is appropriate - whether it be what they let their kids(both male and female) wear to school or what they allow them to watch on T.V. etc.

Rape is a crime of violence, but at the same time it is naive to think that the objectification of women in our popular culture doesn't contribute. Evidence of this is the joking "rape van" comment made my a female "friend" of Nesis, on his FB page. This is in no way to excuse Nesis, but rather to explain how warped ideas can start.

From today's TV, movies, and music you would have a clear "understanding" that going to strip clubs and hiring prostitutes is perfectly acceptable behavior, and not anything to be particularly ashamed of. Practically required behavior at men's bachelor parties. And on the flip side, there is nothing particularly wrong about women dancing in strip clubs and being prostitutes. Just another career choice. For that matter, when did pole-dancing become just another form of exercise? I fully expect pole-dancing for children to be a new adder to the traditional ballet, tap, and modern dance classes at dance academies. This will probably start with high-school age pole-dance classes, and then work its way to younger ages over the next 5-10 years.

The above probably seems ridiculous to many. But who would have expected adult pole-dancing classes in Danville, 5 years ago? It's only a matter of time, and "progress".....

I concur with Helen's comments and others. Parents are either breeders or parents. The breeders are their child's "friend" living through them like Kris Jenner who relishes her daughters' status as public tarts. This isn't based on income. Letting a kid dress provocatively is a form of abuse. Schools have had to give up as many of the breeders will threaten lawsuits if their darlings are challenged. Read--entitlement. If a male teacher comments to admin about inappropriate dress---say a blouse---u better BELIEVE it will be flipped back as to "Why were YOU looking!?" Taught innpublic schools---have seen it all---nothing like watching 6th graders at recess greet a pregnant classmate with the words---"You're sooo lucky!"

I know that this child is raised by divorced parents. Mother was never
the most nurturing person around. I think the children had babysitters
since birth. I do think these children are troubled and the parents
should not have had children. I have complete compassion for the 14 year old girl. Sam Nesis needs to obey societies rules and be charged
and pay for the crime he performed.

By no means am I condoning what this kid did. But come on people. Of course the media is a little to blame here, but blame mostly lies in the parents hands.

Have you taken one second to look at the way 12-18 year old Danville/Alamo, Blackhawk girls dress and act? Seriously. Many of them are absolutely out of control but look so "innocent" on the outside. Reality check here folks...tell your 14 year old daughter that is most likely dressed like a slut not to go for rides (and probably drink and do drugs) with 18 year old guys.

This is coming from a 34 year old father of a 2 year old who is scared to death to raise my kids in this community.

To the folks that hold the media at least partially responsible for the attitudes/actions of our children...I am in total agreement. Our daughters are weaned on tv that warps reality and makes them think they need to look and act like a slut to be accepted. How are they going to grow up with self esteem when the message is "be popular..please a guy and do what ever he wants." Unfortunately it is not something a parent with the best intentions has any control of. If you forbid behaviors in your home, they will do it/see it at their friend's house or somewhere else.
Unfortunately greed and $$$ guides the programing our children watch on television. It is like trying to fight the big oil companys. A parent can talk, lecture, show good examples....but we are no match for Hollywood.

People, People... Rape is a Violent Crime period! I am a mother of 3 boys and Helen I completely agree with you, pick up at MV at time can be shocking. BUT, that does not give anyone the right to violate you regardless of what you are wearing.

There is SO many things wrong with this! Rape is an act of violence NOT sex. 99% of all rapists have been raped themselves. AND what the &*(() is a 14 year old girl out with out a chaperone? DOES ANYONE ACTUALLY KNOW WHERE THEIR CHILDREN ARE? So many of these tragedies ARE preventable. How sad that because of ADULT irresponsibilty 2 young lives are ruined.

Jane, unless you really know the parents and know what the mom has been through the past 10 years you should keep your comments to yourself. It is inappropriate to comment on the parent's child raising efforts in this matter and make the comment that they should not have had kids. If you're interested in being fair (which I doubt), they have a younger son who is a terrific kid so you can't say that the mother failed. Even the best parents can't control certain actions their kids take. Our community and world is full of wonderful, caring and loving parents who have a son or daughter who turned away from them and went down the wrong path. In many instances, the parents did everything they could to raise their children in a positive and loving environment.

For those of us who know the situation well, the divorce turned into a very bitter and ugly multi-year battle. This undoubtedly created gaps in certain parenting oversight and responsibilities. Sam was really affected badly by the divorce. I know the mother well and she made every effort possible to gain full custody of the kids during this time, but had a very difficult time vs. a father with a lot money and a father-in-law who is an attorney. Like I said earlier, lets give credit to the parents in raising a good kid as well.

Bottom line..all of out hearts and prayers go out to the young girl involved. She and her family are going through what no family should ever have to think about. I am sure she is surrounded by a lot of people who love her very much. My heart also goes out to the Nesis family particularly the younger brother. This has to be very difficult on him.

Lets hope that all the young girls in our community do not feel the need to grow up so quickly. It is unfortunate that our society and peer pressure often influences young kids to hang out with certain people and end up in very difficult circumstances. No matter how she ended up in this situation, the young girl deserved better and deserved to be respected. Sam will get his just punishment and it will be harsh, as it should be. This is a very troubled young man and definitely represents a danger to those around him.

God bless all the victims of this terrible crime. So many lives have been changed forever.

Well said SRV DAD. I feel terrible for both families as well. So sad.

SRV Dad: Perhaps the younger son raised himself, as children do when faced with parents who are self-absorbed and uninterested in disciplining the child who takes all the attention. Perhaps the younger son decided early on, to take charge of himself, as some children do, in order to survive the chaos. We pray that he is successful, in order to extricate himself from his brother's legacy.

Well this kid sure got his 15 min. of fame, at the expense of a young lady who will have a lifetime of pain to endure. Now let's hope he gets 20 years of fame with a great cellmate who educates him on just how it feels to be a victim. Would this be wrong? Some would say two wrongs don't make a right. Sorry but if we look at the stats, most of these guys do it again. Best place for him is off the streets and spending a long time alone with those of his calling.
Question, what would have happend to this kid in the old days?

Prayers go out to the young victim in this case. Talking about young girls in Danville, I have not a clue why they all show up to parties wearing neon bootie shorts, bathing suit tops, and tutu's?????? Very respectable moms in Danville and Blackhawk know what there daughter is wearing and approve. As they dance they bend over with suggestive looks to the boys watching. The more bounce, giggling, and anything to attract attention is performed by these young girls. What has happened to our young females today? Where is there self respect? Where are there parents?

To Helen and dville mom and those like them:

People have been raping each other every since the invention of secluded places and penetrative genitalia. Long before Lady Gaga, long before 14-year-olds discovered booty-shorts, long before douchey teenagers drove rape vans.

In all likelihood, people rape each other less now than they did in past centuries / millennia. Nowadays, at least in America (ideally), it's less socially stigmatizing for women to report, easier to prove, tougher to get away with, and more humiliating to be punished for.

Since sexual mores are more relaxed today than you remember as a kid (always the case with every generation), it's pretty easy -- and sounds almost philosophically sound -- to see them emerge ever more shamelessly in music, TV and teenage fashion and assert there must be some connection between that and whatever imagined moral and sexual degradation you believe you have observed in the world.

Surely, there is some. But you're exaggerating it. That's what the human brain does. It recognizes patterns and logical connections much more profoundly than they actually are. Always. Millions of stereotypes, bad social science and superstitions can't be wrong, right?

Here is no apology, just a tough acknowledgment of reality: the willingness and ability to rape has always been one of those less savory aspects of human nature. For better or for worse, human nature hasn't ever -- and doesn't appear too inclined -- to change.

But how you shape a kid's handle on it as a parent, peer and your own self can. Don't blame society (who comprises it?) or the media (who propels it?) or the victim (that's what the fashion argument essentially does). Blame his parents, his friends and their parents, and most of all...

Blame the rapist.

I don’t think that anyone here would disagree that rape is a violent crime. However, there seems to be many opinions as to the cause.

Yes, girls dress too provocatively (I am not saying the victim of this story did, I don’t know her). Other cultures cover their prize processions, what’s wrong with that? Can we change the basics? Boys don’t need to see cleavage at school, thong panties, or shorts/skirts that look like they are bathing suits.

Parents play the biggest role in the development of their child’s character. Parents need to be good role models, teach how to be responsible, and how to respect other people and property. I am tired of seeing disrespectful children vandalizing, bullying; and the “I’m better than everyone else” attitude. Parents need to be more involved. Parents are not supposed to be their child’s friend!

One more thing, for those parents who think their child is perfect, they are not! No child is perfect. Don’t defend your child without hearing both sides of the story or before talking to them. It just promotes the attitude of “I can get away with whatever I want”.

As for media (music, TV, YouTube, etc.), it goes back to good parenting. Limit their time on these things and know what they are listening to and watching.

To concerned neighbor: you are totally right! Two lives are ruined, and it was preventable!

To SRV DAD: so well written! Thank you for pointing out the good in people, and reminding us that parenting is 24/7 for a lifetime even if divorce is in the picture. Parents need to love their children unconditionally and sacrifice everything for them.

To Mike: I understand why you would say that, but how would you feel if it was your child. A little compassion please!

I don’t know these families, but it sounds like they need our support. Don’t condemn, try to help. Let’s make Danville a better place to live. God bless all involved in this story!

This guy is not a graduate of SRVHS. He graduated of the alternative school for all the misunderstood victims.

He is a 2010 graduate of Del Amigo Continuation School, and as such, was in the company of other Danville boys who were bullies, brats, felons, had parents who acted as if everything they did was fine, and generally unpleasant to be around from elementary school to present. Watching these boys grow up to inflict pain on women and society is shameful. Parents must set boundaries, if just to protect the rest of us from their offspring.

By the way, rape occurs for women who wear burquas and veils, too.

You are right "dad who knows", rape happens everywhere & in every culture, but some cultures still value women better than we do.

I have boys, and they know that "no" means NO! And when in doubt, it still means NO! Not only to protect the girl, but to protect themselves as well. Because we live in a world full of peer pressure, a young immature girl may not be able to truly understand how firmly to say “no”; therefore giving mixed messages. Again, I am talking in general, not about the victim of this story.

I am not giving boys an excuse, but a reminder to be careful and show respect at all times.

She was in a hoodie jacket and jeans. The girl was not wearing anything slutty at all. I know this girl and she is not like that. She is the least sluttiest girl out there.

Del Amigo Continuation School. Not long ago this double wide trailer of lower education was a topic here. Out of the cracks came a bunch of defensive parents who told their success stories of their felonious spawn who did time at Del Amigo. Be careful what you say as the guy changing your oil at Jiffy Lube probably graduated from Del Amigo. In this case, the guy with the "rape" van. Probably a shop project at the institution.

We were not there , so we do not know what actually happened. So, until we know the the facts stop judging and be supportive to both families. This could happen to any of you. I'm sure many of you have skeletons in your closet. If we were perfect, the world would be boring.

Besides SRV dad who personally knows one of the families and Annonymous who is telling it like it is-nobody knows the truth at this time-time will tell what happened with proof and evidence. Innocent until proven guilty-both families are devastated I'm sure so let's have a little bit of sympathy for these families instead of condemning them. This could happen to any of you as annonymous so brilliantly said, and I'm sure many of you have skeletons in your closets. Stop judging and be supportive.

Thank you SRV Dad for your comments, I couldn't have said it better ...
We have a lot of very angry, miserable people in this community who just love to spew their hatred and blame on everyone else without really knowing what they are talking about.
Two very sad stories here ... a young girl who's life is forever changed and a young man who is very troubled and needs help. Not to mention their families who I pray are not reading these hateful posts.
Try to be a little more compassionate for both victims in this very very sad story.

Its true that no one "knows" the story. As I said, the whole situation is sad. It is so easy to "label" kids at Del Amigo. I knew plenty of them, and Just as many were students WHO WERE BULLIED , not the other way around. They found no help in the "normal" schools. How many of you knew some of these kids? Knew how much they were struggling and did nothing "because they were not YOUR problem"? How many of us adults could make a difference for some of these kids by making a little effort? Does "attitude truly reflect leadership". Also I knew Sam in grade school. Smart, athletic and always encouraging the younger kids. Ask anyone who had kids in his class before the divorce. On a final note...when we 'adults' are retired and enjoying old age, this generation of children will be running the country.

As a former teacher, and an observer of social behavior, I can tell you that in most cases like this you can tell how a kid will turn out simply by looking at the parents. In rare cases is a kid born bad but it does happen. Most of the time you have parents who are not interested in knowing what the kid is doing, too self-absorbed in their own lives or, sadly, in too many cases these days, not even in the home due to divorce. There is no question that male children require the disciplined hand of a strong father or father figure.

That being said, I do have to wonder just what a 14-year old girl was doing in an automobile with an 18-year old. What is wrong with the parents of a 14-year old girl that they do not know where she is at that time? I have to say that they are nearly as much to blame for what happened to their daughter as is this young thug. What WAS she thinking? Too often young girls go looking for love in all the wrong places not understanding how easily they become targets for immoral little misogenists like this creep. Not to mention that some mothers these days seem more interested in dressing like teenagers rather than setting a modest example for their impressionable daughters. I am often horrified at the manner in which these 40-somethings allow themselves to be seen in public.

It's really a shame that some of our youngsters have no direction whatsoever.

Has anyone actually read what it said. It didn't say she is 14 it says minor age 14 or older. Geesh you all can't read at all.

The word that reached my ears was that the girl was 14. 14, 15, 16, 17, all ages that are under 18. I still ask, why didn't her parents know where she was? She is a minor. THEY are responsible for her well-being until she reaches that magic age of 18. She lives under THEIR roof. Don't you get it?

Wonder why the rape assault etc numbers at private schools are lower? Why do most public school teachers put their own in private schools?

As a former teacher in a private school I can tell you that we did not have the same issues with which to deal. In my class (I taught junior high/middle school math) I was in charge. I took no nonsense from parents who thought I was too tough on their little darlings and as a result, had their respect. Administration backed the teachers up rather than buckling to complaints and threats from unreasonable parents. We didn't need a union to stand up for us. The parents knew that we meant business or they could take their kids back to the public schools and the reasons that the kids were brought to us in the first place.

Excuse me, you who think these DA kids were all bullied: when I read over the names of students who graduated with the rapist in the class of '10, I recognized the names of several boys who terrorized classmates, teammates, neighbors and strangers prior to being sent to Del Amigo. They were out of control from an early age. Please do not generalize about bullies. My children learned early on to stay away from these brats, and after I confronted one of them about his behavior, he left my son alone. Now the police and the courts can take the role of confronting and sentencing the rapist for what he did to a young girl. We don't know if he forced her into his van, or promised a ride home, or what the circumstances were. We only know the outcome, and that he has been charged with further felonies beyond the rape and oral copulation.

Dad who knows-you are generalizing about these DA kids. Everybody has their own story. The "rapist" has not been convicted yet-you don't know what happened-or were you there? Perhaps it is in the best interest of this community if you give these families and kids compassion and understanding and stop generalizing. He has been charged but not yet convicted-I'm sure most parents do the best they can do with their kids and to generalize about any situation is wrong unless you know the facts.

I know this is off topic but wanted to add to some of the comments already made:
I know there are many great teachers and many wonderful kids working hard and taking advantage of what is being offered to them at school, that being said I can't believe some of the stories I hear:

Kids being disrespectful in class, kids using extremely fowl language, inappropriate clothes or lack of at school and recently, some boys chewing tobacco during P.E. There are some teachers that either don't see what's going on or don't seem to care. What is it with teachers that are constantly showing movies in class - some completely unrelated to the topic. Teachers that teach for half a class and then have their students sit and talk for the remainder of the period (while they're busy on the computer). Teachers that teach straight out of the text without engaging their students. I could go on but again this belongs somewhere else.

HM Right ON! And believe me, it is ON TOPIC! Life is a domino effect. ATTITUDE reflects leadership - look at the parents/teachers and see what it produces.

Please correct me if I am wrong, but isn’t Del Amigo where the exceptionally gifted and responsible homeschooled children go that need to complete a few credits that they can’t do at home?

To H.M.: I am right with you. I only have one teacher that I can say was a good teacher who really wanted the best for her students, and unfortunately, she just retired. Many teachers are too young or too old or just plain don’t care. I think the major problem, again, goes back to the parents. Some teachers are just afraid to stand up to overbearing parents who think their children are perfect.

danville mom: I pointed out that I recognized the names of some of the DA students I knew to be antisocial. I do not see how that is generalizing the entire class of 2010 for DA. I referred only to the boys that I personally know to be troubled. Perhaps you should reread what I wrote. It seems to me that my comment was misunderstood.

Marie: There are two continuation schools in our district. Venture and Del Amigo, and you can go to the SRVUSD website for descriptions of each.

dad who knows-you seem to be angry in general and unhappy with Danville, the schools, etc. Perhaps you should get some professional help and let these poor families and kids get the help they need instead of condemning them and putting them down. Are your kids perfect? Are you an amazing dad? Are your kids perfect? Try having alittle compassion for those around you or move to another area that suits you better. Nobody is perfect and everybody tries their best with their kids. I find your comments disturbing, especially since you dont know the families involved, the circumstances or the facts and you weren't there at the time. Let's see what happens with this and then maybe you can use real FACTS.

Eric, I come from a family of educators (3 generations of teachers and administrators) and no one has had their kids go to private school. Where did you get the information that most public school teachers put their own kids in private school? This hasn't been the case in my own family or my colleagues. Frankly, with our salaries, we can't afford private school even if we wanted to send our kids there. Luckily, we have been really happy with the public schools here in Danville.

I see the provocative clothing worn by kids these days and it baffles me as a parent that other parents let their kids buy/wear these clothes. My (now grown) daughter wasn't so interested in showing off her body, thank goodness. If she had been, I would have set some major limits and not bought the clothes in the first place. That said, regardless of how she dressed I would not have blamed her for an act of violence perpetrated by another - the responsibility there is all on the perpetrator.

HM - My gosh you are so RIGHT!! Could not have said it better.

For those who want to defend a RAPIST! Get real.....l I hope he spends MANY years behind bars period! I don't care what anyone says and how some of you say we should feel so "sorry" for him and his family, or how we should not judge him. You better believe I will judge his "actions" HORRIFIC!! Bottom line is, there is NO excuse for what he did and he needs to pay for violating an innocent young girl period end of story!

He's a RAPIST!!

Uh, Danville Mom, I was dealing in facts. I love this area, lived here forever, and am not the least bit unhappy. I commented on the boys that I know from the Class of '10, Del Amigo. The charges faced by the rape perpetrator are real. I was not attempting to appear disturbed. The attack on my son by one of these boys in that graduating class was witnessed by me. The actions of the other boys that I mentioned were witnessed by me and other adults. The parents in these cases refused to do anything to change the antisocial behaviors exhibited by their children. My children are not perfect; it is odd for you to even say that. Perhaps you are related to one of the boys to whom I refer?

No one said to feel sorry for a rapist. All that was stated was that UNTIL the trial was over, to reserve judgement, (unless of couse you were there) What EVERYONE is saying is that this situation (for both parties) was EXTREMELY PREVENTABLE. The question is now, what as adults and members of society due to prevent this happening? How can we help? What can be done? Bottom line KIDS NEED HELP, that should be the only thing we can do as of now. Blaming etc never helped anyone. Step up to the plate ADULTS and help with the new generation.

Exscuse me Danville resident...but who made you judge and jury. Do you know everything your children are doing, or your husband. Dont't judge. As I have stated before, none of us are perfect. Some of us try harder than others to achieve that persona. I don't think anyone teachers their children to be criminals. I think that we behave in a way that teaches our children that cetain behaviors are acceptable without realizing what we are doing.
No women should ever be forced to have sex, but I do think women put themselves in vulnerable situations and say things that give the impression that they are up for anything. Many of you women get dressed up to go out with your friends in hopes of getting noticed. You have too much to drink, things happen you may or may not regeret.
We are teaching our children that casual sex is acceptable.
Sex is great!...but shouldn't be shared with just anyone.
Ladies, men dont't think it's sexy for a woman to have multiple partners.
We don't know what happened that night with these two kids, and I don't think we will ever know the complete truth...Right now they are both victims of our society.
Stop blaming each other and the media and look at yourselves.

DWK-I'm sorry that your son was was attacked by one of the DA boys in the class of '10. I think your e-mails are mean, harsh, and you act as if you are the perfect parent of perfect boys and that none of us are doing anything to help our children and parent them properluy. You appear to lack the sympathy gene. I feel you are generalizing and no I dont know any of the boys to whom you refer, but you appear angry and disturbed. I know many people whose kids have been hurt and attacked by kids around here-boys and girls. It is awful and horrendous. I was just wondering why you have no sympathy for anybody but your own family. There are lots of families here who need our love and support. Ragging on them doesn't help. Helping them and loving them and properly parenting them does.

Just curious - we do not know the age 14,15,16 or 17? By the way, Selena Gomez, who is 19, is kissing and hanging with some dude named Justin Bieber, who is 17. Hmmm, double standard?

John Stevens - cmon dude do you even have any kind of intelligence? We're talking about RAPE here!
Selena Gomez/Justin Bieber really dude? Really?

I’m glad people are getting angry. Just remember to focus your energy on something that can help. If I knew these families, I would be calling and visiting to help them through this; even if I didn’t agree with their parenting style.

Anonymous- first spell the name you are using correctly... but, Really? Really? first of all... one is a kid... the rapist Sam Nesis is an adult! There were not "two kids" involved. Sam was the adult here and KNOWS BETTER!

Even if a women is in a vulnerable situation IT DOES NOT GIVE ANYONE THE RIGTH TO VIOLATE HER PERIOD!! AND, it does not matter what she is wearing PERIOD!!

NO means NO, not maybe, or your drunk, or your dressed provocatively, or anything else, NO means NO

This Rapist SAM NESIS needs to have the key thrown away! PUT HIM IN JAIL!

You guys act like this is the girls fault so many of you have said some rude things towards girls. Some girls like her are'nt sluts and dress like that. I know this girl and what she is going through is not good she is traumatized, and it was her friends birthday party and that some people that wern't even invited to showed up like Sam. He gave her a ride home because he said he could because he was giving two other girls a ride home and said that he was dropping the other girls off first because Danville is closer then Walnut Creek from Concord. So what does that tell you. I will not say anymore but know that this girl is different and very nice and not slutty she is not the type that goes and flirts with guy's, and for heavan sake she was in a hoodie and jeans not a tutu or booty shorts. Im here to tell you guys to take it easy because she has cried from some comments. This is not her fault what happened. He raped her he is a rapist. How are you going to sit here and defend a rapist?

Anonymous From Walnut Creek WELL SAID!!!!

This guy SAM NESIS is a RAPIST!!

This young girl should NOT be made to feel like its her fault. AND, if she is by any chance reading these comments I would like to let her know she did NOTHING WRONG. So sorry this happened to you.

The man who violated her is a RAPIST and deserves to spend MANY years in prison! Not to ever hurt another girl/women again

For those who want to blame an innocent young girl KNOCK IT OFF!

Young lady, if you are reading these comments, know that we are on your side, and pray for your healing from this terrible event. We hope that justice will be served, and your attacker will be removed from society for a long time. No one should be violated in this way.

I don't see one comment where someone is defending the rapist nor do I see any comment where the victim is being blamed. It's a general discussion and would like to see it continue but maybe this is not the place.

For those of you who would like to focus blame on this girl or her parents, you will be ashamed when the facts of this case come out. This was a a violent crime committed by a violent rapist who has been charged with 5 felonies so far. For those in the know, this was not his first criminal offense nor will it be his last if he ever goes free. He has traumatized a sweet young girl's life and robbed her of her innocence, her youth, her freedom to ever feel normal or safe and what should be some of the best years of her life. Shame on all of you who would even dare comment that it could remotely be her fault or her parents. Rape and felony sexual assaults are never the victim's fault. It never has anything to do with sex.... it has everything to do with the perpetrators need for power to express rage and control over his victim. When will our society ever understand this? If you want to discuss how the kids of today behave than I agree, move it to another site.

Anonymous from Alamo - Amen Brother or Sister!

Again...no one is blaming the victim, no one is defending the boy. Some general comments were made about parenting and dress, but that's it. Most who made general comments, wished both families luck with dealing with this horrible situation.

I dont know how anybody can possibly know any facts about this except for the 2 people that were involved in the incident in the van. I feel sorry for both families. I dont think it is healthy for the victim to be reading this and i dont think the boy is reading this because he is in jail. It sounds like a horrible situation that involved alcohol and I wish both families luck and hope that the truth comes out. Court is not always fair-I certainly hope that it is in this case and that facts can be made and proven and that those that deserve to be punished are.

What parent/care giver would even let this girl read ANY of this. Sure she is being taking care of, not having enough to deal with now she is reading all of this. Um what is wrong with this picture. Also, I do BLAME adults. Pick up your own kid, make sure they TRUST you enough to call if in an unsafe position and be aware. Check check and double check. Does that excuse this? Absolutly not - but for godsake, be RESPONIBLE adults. I say this for myself and everyone, Please please lets prevent this and all other things that are unsafe for kids.

I begin by saying I am NOT blaming the victim, for those of you that keep going there, but I do agree with Concerned Neighbor. Why is she being allowed to read these comments (if true). We don't know the specifics of this case, I'd like to know at what time the crime occurred and also, was there any supervision at the party where this guy showed up uninvited? Again, I agree with CN, we as parents need to be more responsible and teach responsibility to our kids. We can't put them in a plastic bubble and overprotect but we can set rules and enforce them. It's difficult being a teen, we want to reduce their dependence on us but they still need us very much.

the girl this man did this to is my best friend and i want the same thing done to him that he did to her!

I have an idea.

Let's all do an act of charity, give this poor girl her privacy back.

Let's stop ourselves from leaving anymore comments.

I got to know Sam for several months, and I think he is a terrific young man. It was shocking to read about the rape charges, I have no idea what his home life has been in past 18 years, but it is quite obvious that something was not right for him to act this way. I have never been sympathetic toward rapists, but what Sam has done is just very sad. To me it sounds like cry for help for more than "need to control someone", as what a rape usually is about. I can not imagine what this young woman must be going through at this time, how she will ever be able to trust a man again, is beyond me. I see this hole horrible event as very tragic,and sad. Sam's life will be forever changed as is his victim's. But in this instance I see two victims of horrible crime, Sam a victim of his own actions which he could not/or refused to control, and of course a young woman who was in the wrong place at the wrong time. So very sad all the way around.

First off, I would like to start off by saying, there is ABSOLUTELY no justification for rape, what-so-ever. Trying to say a divorce contributed to an occurrence as such, is absolutely ludicrous. How many of the mothers commenting on this story have kids, I'm sure many of your kids friends have divorced parents, if you yourself aren't divorced. Defending this kid in any way what-so-ever clearly shows a lack of morals on your part and further contributes to the realistic reality: anyone who defends a rapist is clearly the scum of the earth.

Second, saying the media encouraged this in anyway, makes no sense at all. When have you EVER heard rape being encouraged in any form of media whether it be music, television, movies, etc, society has made it quite clear that raping someone is as low as one can go. Sex sells, its reality, but no one is preaching rape.

Third, although this point is absolutely irrelevant to a girl getting raped, the way girls dress at Monte Vista, that is of no concern to you given outfits aren't offensive, which last time I checked, showing a little bit of skin is harmless. If a parent is OK with how their child looks, that is THEIR choice/opinion. Worry about your own child, not someone else's (in this case at least concerning clothing.)

This kid deserves NOTHING but the absolute worst, I can honestly say I have no sympathy to such a low life individual who could rot in hell for I care. Raping a girl is inexcusable, If it were up to my republican self a death sentence would be in place to any rapist. People like this should be dealt with in the worst possible way. A rapist knows EXACTLY what he/she is doing, last time I checked the desire to have sex is a mutual feeling, rape clearly isn't mutual. I hope for nothing but the worst upon Mr. Sam Nesis, and the day he ends up in jail he will most definitely realize what he did when countless other inmates do whatever they want to him, because we all now that even a murderer looks down upon a rapist in the walls of a prison.

Monte Vista 09 Grad - Spot on! He has his coming in prison! I would not refer to him as "Mr." its more like Rapist Sam Nesis

According to the comments left on this blog, Sam Nesis is already more than guilty of raping this girl. He might have as well started doing his 15 years of prison time yesterday. However there is not one shred of factual information on this blog, just hearsay.

I once knew of a girl who was underage, who became exceeding embarrassed of her actions that she claimed rape against the boy.

I know that this is not the case in this particular matter, as Sam Nesis is guilty as charged by the Danville community.

I believe that Sam Nesis is currently in jail and I thought that the way the law worked was innocent until proven guilty. Yes, most of you think he is guilty, but he has only been charged-not proven guily, so people, let's wait until the facts come out and stop condemning people until we know the truth. The only people that really know what happened are Sam and the girl so as "shocked" so eloquently said, lets stop ourselves from leaving anymore comments until the facts are proven and we know the truth. How unfair to assume anything at this point. How unfair to both families. Innocent until proven guilty people. Look at some of these posts-they are utterly revolting.
Furthermore, unless you know these families personally, you have no business trashing them. I find it sickening that people would trash people they dont even know.

Monte Vista '09 grad from "Blackhawk"-you need to go back to school because you have learned nothing and your comments are pathetic. You disgust me. Are you going to college or did you not get in? Living off of mommy and daddy in Blackhawk? You are a low life individual who could rot in hell for all I care. Your Republican self should get a death sentence because you suck. Why dont you study up on the law and get your facts right beacuse they are not facts-they are your low life opinions. Go back to school and educate yourself.

Alamo Mom, really? I can only hope that you are not a real mom and that you just chose to use that name.

Alamo Mom - you are that parent who raises kids like Sam, pathetic. What school did you go to? How to raise thugs school? Nobody cares what you have to say!

Shame on you Alamo mom! You only succeeded at stooping to the same low level you were condemning. As for SR mom, who "knew" Sam and found him to be a "terrific" young man, did you also know that he was on probation at the time of his arrest for a conviction of similar nature? See how easily you were deceived by him and you are an adult? Sam Nesis is a repeat offender and a danger to society. No one should consider their daughters safe around him. I wouldn't be surprised at all if there are other young girls who have been sexually assaulted by him and have not come forward because of fear. I hope his name stays in the media so others will have the courage to come forward. Oh yes, he will have his day in court and he will be found guilty. The facts and evidence in this case are overwhelmingly against him. He will get his just desserts for the horror he has perpetrated on an innocent young girl.

I was just quoting the brilliant words that Monte Vista '09 Grad from Blackhawk said-re read her blog. It is cruel, thoughtless and based not on reality. She is not a mom and had cruel untruthful words to say. Unless you KNOW the facts and KNOW the families, keep it to yourselves. Innocent until proven guilty. The truth will come out but to just post all of these words is sick. Were you there ate the scene? Justice will prevail, but it will take time to gather facts.

Alamo mom, I was a 4.0 student in high school, currently attending USC, double majoring in economics and journalism. Clearly I do not posses a respectable educational background right? Yes, my words are cruel, but unless you live under a rock you would be aware of the cruel society we live in, cruel enough to the point this 18 year old detriment to society (calling him a man would defy any definition of what a man should be) raped an innocent girl and forever changed her life.

I personally find it absolutely sickening that a kid barely 2 years younger than me would do such a thing.

Monte Vista 09 Grad - Do not know who you are but sooo proud of you! You are the very student we hope our kids turn out to be like. Im sure you were an incredible role model while at Monte Vista. If we had more of you in our community we would not see disgrace like Sam Nesis.

Keep up the GREAT work!!

Alamo mom you are right, innocent until proven guilty. Do you have a daughter? If you do, how would you feel if she came home and told you she was raped? Sorry, but we will just have to wait and see what the courts say.

Alamo mom you are right. Innocent until proven guilty. Do you have a daughter? If you do. What would you say to her if she came home and told you she was raped? Sorry, but we have to wait to see what the courts decide?

monte vista '09 grad-I graduated from a much better school than USC and then went on to a much beter grad school. Lucky for you that mommy and daddy paid for USC, huh? I paid for ungrad and grad school myself. Innocent until proven guilty. Look at your words-pathetic. Until this trial is over, nobody knows any facts-this is all hearsay. When the trial is over, you can say all you want. Did you try to get into ucla or berkely? I bet you couldn't get in.

Again, Alamo Mom, really? Seriously, are you really a mother?

There are many comments that really bother me, but then I look to see who said it or try to guess. If comments seem to be coming from a child, then I just let it go. But when I see comments, like yours above, coming from someone who says they are a mom, really gets to me.

Everyone has there opinion, some are more vocal than others; but a true mother would never say she is better than anyone else or say hurtful things!

Marie:
This entire blog section is filled with hurtful comments and nobody really knows the facts yet. I am done as I find these comments hurtful, hearsay, pathetic, angry, awful in general. I will no longer even look at this because until we know the facts at trial and justice has been served I find this a waste of time and energy. Look at MV '09 grads comments-does she know these kids or the families-was she at the party-were any of you? How many times have girls cried rape or boys commited rape-we just dont know until this is over. Innocent until proven guilty. We ued to call USC university of spoiled children-not that hard to get into if you have the bucks.

Alamo Mom.. You are PATHETIC!!! An absolute LOSER! Your comments on USC say it all LOL

Alamo Mom: You must be very insecure to feel the need to make those comments to MV09 about USC. Real issue here is not whether USC is a better college than a UC: Real issue is that a local person who is legally an adult has been arrested for raping a young, minor girl. Police do not just randomly arrest people for violent crimes without sufficient evidence. Is he entitled to his day in court: Absolutely. Is he considered innocent until convicted: Absolutely. My thoughts and prayers are with the minor victim and her family.

Whether Sam was on probation at the time of his arrest or not does not alter my opinion about him. I still think he is a terrific young man, whether his is guilty or not, we do not know for sure until trial is over and justice has prevailed. I have no reason to doubt the young woman's accusations, and thankfully it is not up to me or us to decide whether Sam is guilty or not, that's why we have our court system. We have the best justice system in the world, not guilty until proven so. Every human being deserves to be treated with dignity, respect and justice, not because of who they are or what they have done and regardless whether they themselves have shown same to others. Our justice system is one thing that separates us from dictatorial countries, thankfully so.

"Alamo mom and Monte Vista 09' grad." book education does not teach you about life. You can be total jerk whether you graduated from John Hopkins Uni. or DVC. And No, divorce is not an excuse for rape, never! But, it is those kind of experiences that shapes and makes us who we are. Sounds like you have had pretty easy and well balanced life, no messy/difficult/devastating life experiences(Monte Vista 09'grad.) that's great, but it is easy to judge when you are looking down, it is much harder when you are in same level. I also think your strong opinions are result of your age, we have all been 20 once.

...I should add, I am not defending Sam or his accused actions. As a woman I can not think more horrible thing to happen to an other woman than a rape, but I do strongly believe in our justice system. And, both Sam and his alleged victim will have their day in court, until that day there is not much more anyone can say.

"SR Mom" sounds like a mom!

I'm still questioning whether "Alamo mom" is really a mother. Or maybe a very young mother?

Anyway, I wish the 2 families in this story peace.

All of you. Each and every one of you should be ashamed of yourselves. Leave this to our court system. How do you think these kids' families feel reading these hateful posts. I know my stomach hurts after reading this hate mail. Right now I am embarassed for our town. Go do something helpful for someone in need and get on with your lives.

Alamo mom, the fact that you feel the obligation to criticize the university I attend is absolutely hilarious, especially stemming from the fact that I was merely stating a little bit of background information about myself due to your immature remarks directed towards me. It must make you feel like such a significant member of society mouthing off to a student stating an opinion. And for the record, I got into UCLA, along with several top tier schools. And I most definitely haven't grown up in this little bubble we call Danville, your tendency to jump to conclusions is quite pathetic I might add. I end it at this, wondering if you will once again feel the urge once again have the last word and make yourself seem like an even worse mother than you have already portrayed on this forum.

SR mom, I completely agree with your thoughts on the school you attend and me being 20, obviously I am very outspoken and don't have the least bit a problem with it. But I find it very hard to believe that if you had a son and he raped a girl, while on probation for similar but not as severe offenses, you'd be able to defend him. Isn't there a breaking point where you would say enough is enough? I know for a fact the majority of my peer's parents would turn their backs to their child had they committed such a horrible crime. Once again, I may just be speaking out of personal opinion, but as a parent how would you be able to sleep at night knowing your child changed an innocent girls life.

Innocent until proven guilty is obviously the American way, but so many factors contribute to thinking otherwise. Probation for a similar arrest, that means at some point or another in fairly recent time he was unable to control himself. Another factor, Sam is an adult, and was with a minor, clearly with sexual intentions in mind, that is ILLEGAL, whether it was rape or not. Also, do you really think a girl that young and in high school would report a rape case knowing the distress the court process causes. It takes a strong person to be able to go through with all that. Innocent until proven guilty is part of American law, but how oblivious can one be when the writing is written clearly on the wall.

Life is about choices. What in world was this "innocent" girl hanging out with a Del Amigo kid, in the first place? We already know the boys and girls attending Del Amigo high school are certainly of questionable character. I would never allow my son or daughter associate with any Del Amigo kid, and avoid the area of the school like it was the plague.

The alledged incident tells me more about this "innocent" girl than it tells me about a Del Amigo student. I already know enough about the Del Amigo environment. Now I know much more about this poor, innocent girl's choices, and her family life.

There are many people in the San Ramon Valley Unified School District who are not really aware of the purpose for Del Amigo Continuation School. How would a 14 year old from the Walnut Creek School District have any idea? The topic of schools may not have been broached in the conversation.

Now that I spent the last 10 minutes reading comments about the crime, the suspect, the parents, the school, the community, ucla, usa, blackhawk, danville and other various topic....AND also the various vicious jabs between and directed to the various bloggers....i am exhausted and disturbed about the lack of insight and intellected manifested by most of these comments. if this was a dogfight, instead of a "blogfight", i would suggest throwing water on all of you.... instead, YOU SHOULD ALL GET A LIFE!!!

I agree with Newbee, but thought I would correct the typo's and add a few more to his or her comment which should have looked like this: Now that I spent the last 10 minutes reading comments about the crime, the suspect, the parents, the school, the community, ucla, USC, private schools, SRVHS, DA, MVHS, short skirts, blackhawk, danville, unions, god, sex, drugs, alcohol,republicans, minors, majors, in betweens, and other various topics....AND also the various vicious jabs between and directed to the various bloggers....i am exhausted and disturbed about the lack of insight and intellect manifested by most of these comments. if this was a dogfight, instead of a "blogfight", i would suggest throwing water on all of you.... The boy is in jail, the victim will hopefully heal, and you bloggers should all GET A LIFE!!!

Let's start by correcting YOUR "typo's". It is "typos" plural, not "typo's" possessive. Know what you're talking about before you correct someone else for such pettiness.

P.S. You night also learn how to use capitals properly while you are at it. Didn't you pay any attention in 5th grade english class?

Stick to the topic and leave personalities et al out of it.

MV09 grad. Do you think that if this girl was indeed raped, then her or her family would have a right to take Sam's life? As a Republican are you suggesting anarchy is only way? I hope you are not. It is not for us to decide who is guilty and who is not, that is the job for the juridical system as well as is the punishment. Personally I know something about medical field and how rape victims are handled at the hospitals, even oral copulation can be proven if it was done forcefully or not. I have no reason to doubt this young woman's story, but like I said "innocent until proven guilty". What becomes to mothering, I assume you are too young to be a parent and therefore cannot understand the mother's love. If you live in Blackhawk and attended Monte Vista High school, then I am sure you are aware of heroin abuse among the students. How many times have you witnessed parents doing everything in their power to try to help their children by allowing them to continue living under the same roof with them? Time after time these children rob and betray their parents and time after time these parents take them back, why? Because these parents are the only ones that these children have left. And, I am not saying that they are doing any favors for their children by enabling addiction to continue. No matter what your child has done, as a mother you will never stop loving your child. I've seen enough single parent households to know that there is a hole lot more guilt going around than in two parent households, and guilt can make any good parent to do bad parenting. When 18 years old young man has committed such a crime as a rape, do you think that his mother should turn her back on him at that moment? How could she, who else is there to try to defend her son and love him when everyone else is ready to lynch him? I think the breaking point will come later to that mother, after her son has gone to a prison. About sleeping at night, I doubt if Sam's mother has slept at all since all this happened. By the way, anyone who thinks that the alleged victim is somehow to blame is complete fool. A woman, especially a young woman never, ever deserve to get raped, no matter what the circumstances are.

This thread presents an excellent argument for requiring posters to use their own names.

I'm not using mine because some of you, alamo mom, scare the living bejeebus outta me.

Just as a FYI. Ever since the new principle the dress code HAS BEEN ENFORCED!!!!!!!!! The principle along with the rest of the administration walks around with XXL Mv graduation tshirts from like 07 and 08 and make you wear them if you are in violation of the dress code. In addition, they take your name down and if you violate the dress code twice you get a saturday school.
-MV senior 2011.

Thanks for sharing that MV2011! And good luck in your future, hopefully you are college bound?

Remember your principal is your "pal". Smart idea though.

I happen to know many of the facts and hopefully the truth will come out-there was no rape-in fact-there was no witness'-Sam went to the CHP on his own-yes he is in jail but it is a he said she said situation. The article written was entirely from the girl who was upset that she lost her cellphone in the car-Sam found it the next day and returned it to her. Those of us who know Sam know that he is not capable of rape-

You left out the part where he hit her with his car while she was getting her phone! Did you see the bruises on her...cuz I did! Sam is a piece of shit I happen to know the girl, and she is 14....If he had lots of girls to choose from why a little girl to rape? It's just sick!

[Post removed because of unacceptable langauge]

Concerned in Walnut Creek, here is a question for you. I am not blaming the girl at all but just very curious...What was this "innocent" 14 years old doing in someone like Sam Nesis car in the middle of the night, by herself? Did he kidnap her or something? I think we all would like to know that. I think 14 years old should be old enough to know not to go into stranger's car, I mean that's what we tell to our kids all the time.

Two peas in the pod. The girl is not a poor, innocent victim. She crossed the Rubicon, and must now follow through. The outcome may not be what she, her family, or the community expected.

If Sam is such a bad person, why was this "young" girl hanging around him?

The profanity in the comment above does not assist in making any points in supporting the alledged victim.

You all have too much time on your hands. Let the facts come out in court and then decide. So quick to pass judgment.

If you didn't already know there was two other girls in the car and she thought she was safe. How dare you all blame her did you see her body after everything? She is still in pain. If you are Sam's cousin did you know he had a past history of stalking girls and hitting girls? He was on probation at the time he was caught because of something that had to do with a girl. The victim here is the 14 year old girl she didnt know him they never talked at HER friends birthday party. This is nobodys fault but his. How would you all feel if you were in her position or if you had a daughter in her position with people defending a rapist? All of you will see when he is found guilty. Because in April they are looking at all the evidence all the pictures of wounds and all her statements. She screamed hoping someone could help her. And if he is so "innocent" why did he keep changing his first and lastname and take her phone? You will all be ashamed when the facts come out and they find him guilty.

Annonymous-your facts are absolutely incorrect-they are just wrong-please, unless you know things it is unfair to post-and 4 times at that. The facts will come out-yes that is true-but your facts are wrong.

First time I heard about this, thought to myself, what an complete a-hole, but now. You have this innocent, little, 14-yr, child, who goes to her friends party, hooks up with the guy who looks like his 20, thinks to herself that she can brag to her friends about this guy, things don't go the way she wants, and now she is crying rape...sorry but having really hard time to have sympathy for this so called innocent child.

[Post removed because of unacceptable language]

Cake, if she is your best friend then you must be over 18 yr, so what kind 14 yr hangs with 18 yr old? That there says a lot about her already. I am not saying she is lying, I am just saying she got what she was asking for. And where was her parents, WTF was 14 yr old innocent girl doing partying in the next town over?? There is just too much bull crap with the hole half of the story.

Curious... are you okay? When did she ever brag? You don't know what your talking about, you obviously are a family member of SAM! So sad...lets just say it was consensual EVEN THOUGH IT WASN'T sex with a 14 yr. old is ILLEGAL!And you say she got what she deserved? What did she deserve? Are you actually saying people have to stay in their own towns....you asked why was she in the next town over?

CURIOUS! first of all i have known this girl forever. and how do you know im 18? you dont know anything about me or my friend. she is like my sister. and how do you know what she was thinking or doing? were you there? i dont think so. you just need someone to blame and your blaming the wrong person. this young girl is the sweetest person i have ever met and you are just hella dumb and dont know the story. your all using your imagination to make up a story. but why dont you all just leave her alone and stop commenting on here.

SICK OF THIS COMMENT BOARD! i admire you for believing in the truth. i know you have your heart in the right place, and thats for the young girl.

Someone who knows, my facts are correct you are the wrong one.